Nursing mothers: are we so intolerant of women who do not breastfeed?

The World Health Organization has been saying for years that breastfeeding is one of the best gifts we can give our children. And it is clear that breastfeeding is full of advantages, but it is a personal choice, of each one of us. So why are we so uncompromising with women that they decide to raise their children in another way?

I have the impression that today all we are under brutal pressure to breastfeed our children. Yes or yes. But what about those who have difficulty doing so? Or do they have to return to work very soon? Or those who want to share that responsibility with their partner? Or, simply those who do not want because breastfeeding does not go with them?

I nominate you to breastfeed.

Ok, yes, breastfeeding is full of advantages: according to the WHO we pass anti-bodies to our babies through breast milk and another thousand benefits, it is more practical and, of course, it is cheaper. I will not deny any of these advantages. But it is not the paradise that they try to sell us. It is not always as perfect as those told in the leaflets in the waiting room of our midwives. Being a nursing mother involves a series of sacrifices that not everyone is willing or able to assume.

Breastfeeding is wonderful, but it also means giving up your independence and dedicating yourself exclusively to feeding your baby.

Is breastfeeding a fad?

That breastfeeding is in vogue is more than obvious. And it is that from a time to this part everything that is the return to the origins, the natural upbringing, is tendency. But like breastfeeding, it occupies all the top positions of molonismo it also gives the impression that judging others by the decisions they make has become trending topic.

Doctors, nurses, professionals of all kinds, associations ... campaign to support breastfeeding and thus put pressure on mothers who decide to adopt other options. Many of them feel judged all the time. It seems they are doing something wrong. And they feel guilty for not doing what everyone tells them is best for their children. However, there are those who think in other places, that midwives and doctors do not support breastfeeding enough and that there should be more information.

"Many mothers did not understand that I would find it difficult, that I would be overwhelmed thinking of breastfeeding. Many found it so natural, so easy, that it was difficult for them to understand why it was not for me." Celia, mother of two children.

We asked a colleague who decided to give the bottle the reasons to do it: "... I think that the milks of now are of excellent quality and complete at the nutritional level and thus also what the child eats is perfectly controlled. The children who are breastfed get bad the same, so I did not believe that breastfeeding had no advantage. " But we also wondered if he received a lot of pressure to breastfeed: "No, because in my family and my husband's, with exceptions, they have never been very supportive of breastfeeding".

Something very different lived Olga, a reader of Trendencias who told us her experience: "My decision to opt for the bottle was mostly taken by my tremendous modesty. I felt unable to breastfeed outside my house, or even in my house in front of another person.".

Some women are already clear from pregnancy that breastfeeding is not for them.

As expected, she received criticism, although she was prepared for it: "Luckily, from the first moment I had the support of the child's father, which was the only opinion that I cared about something (...). More than caring about the opinion of people as a personal attack, it bothered me how close they can get to be some people.

In his opinion there is a pressure for women to breastfeed instead of bottles: "On the one hand, society in general, including media, groups of mothers, etc., in which breastfeeding, attachment breeding, etc. is constantly praised, but in a way that seems to criminalize who opt for another way to raise. In the "from you to you", apart from some comments and criticisms, as I said before, it was more about reproachful looks and having to explain and justify myself. That is, I don't know any case in the who asked "And why did you decide to breastfeed?"

"I will never try to convince anyone that he has to opt for artificial breastfeeding, so it bothered me that they did the opposite with me." Olga, mother of a child.

The extremes were never good.

Are we entitled to label all those who choose to bottle feed as selfish or bad mothers? Fortunately for all of us, we live in a civilized country where access to quality artificial milks is easy and no child will stop growing and be happier because their family opts for artificial upbringing. Isn't it so bad to press these women to make a choice that goes against what they want as thinking that what we say is best for their children? Before commenting, wouldn't it be better to know your reasons? There are many reasons to respect mothers who have decided to bottle feed. Before judging anyone we should know their reasons, try to understand them better and not fall into hasty judgments.

For women who want to share the care of the baby with their partner, artificial feeding is the option to choose.

I I am neither pro-breastfeeding nor anti-breastfeeding but firm advocate for individual freedom. I think that Being a nursing mother should be a personal choice, not an obligation. You can be the best of the mothers giving the bottle and sharing this task with your partner or with the people around you. Moreover, I was raised with a bottle (something very typical in our country in the 60s and 70s) and, although years later I decided to breastfeed my two daughters, I have never thought that my mother loved me less Me and my brothers for making a different decision from mine.

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Video: The NIFTY Cup: A Feeding Tool for Babies Who Can't Breastfeed (January 2020).